Whassup, my dear フレンドs, having an amazing day? 🤣 I’m having a cozy day at home ignoring the calls of my grandmother lol. Also, it’s raining and I love it, love the atmosphere 🥰
Today, I don’t really feel like talking, so no podcast for today 🤷♀️ You’ll have to be satisfied with me in written form 🤷♀️😂 After all, it’s 知る者は言わず言う者は知らず、right? 😂 Of course that doesn’t count for me 😏 #ARROGANCE! 😂😂😂
Okay, I went out after writing that first part, so it wasn’t just a lazy day at home after all 🤷♀️ For some reason, I don’t like being at home during the day, when it’s not dark 🤷♀️ Also, I don’t feel particularly good if I don’t move at least a little bit in a day. So I guess it’s “Wer rastet, der rostet” after all 🤷♀️😂
Holy cow, I just got recommended this song and I LOVE THE BEAT! It’s EPIC! And look, it’s red and black again 😈 Also, Koi fish spirit 😈
“The meaning of the koi also symbolizes peace, healing, and open channels. When the koi totem appears to you, restore the peace that you have lost and allow yourself to heal from your hurts. … The koi totem represents good fortune and a successful career. It symbolizes prosperity and harmony.” (Source)
Also, look at today’s Google doodle 😂
That’s because it’s Unity Day in Germany 😂
So that means the supermarket is closed n I forgot about it yesterday and I’m outta rice n lemons, which means I have to survive tomorrow without rice and lemons! What a shame! Shit should be available 24/7! 😂😂😂
So, I got 2 comments on my last post and uhh… Idk, one in particular (I deleted it, sorry 🤷♀️🤣 It was weirdly phrased, so not sure if I got it right, but it sounded like that person was just self-advertising 🤔, so… nope. Not on ma website, dude 🤷♀️😂 (lemme know if I was wrong tho 😂)) felt a little off, cuz y’know, I mean I wrote about statistics and AdWords n stuff, but that’s actually not the point, y’know? 🤷♀️ I just talked about it, because I wanted to show you some synchronicities, but people seem to completely ignore that and just focus on the material aspects, like how much traffic and how much potential revenue… Jesus, I’m telling you once again, my main purpose here is not to make a living out of ma blog, but to share stuff, express myself and enlighten people 😂😂😂
That AdWords thingy… I’m just trying it out, cuz it’s there anyway 😂, but I read that you need like thousands of impressions to just make 1$ lmao, so let’s not take things here too seriously and just have some fun, shall we? 😂
And then there’s lot of stuff out there that goes like “How to be a good writer” or “THIS IS WHAT YOU SHOULD DO BEFORE PUBLISHING YOUR NEXT BLOG POST”, fucking annoying lol. Just shut the fuck up and let people do their thing, okay? There is no fucking standard and no fucking frame in ART, okay?! I fucking write how I want and what I want, who the fuck are you to tell me what’s right and what’s wrong n what’s good and what’s bad lmao. Yeah… I’ve seen those titles a lot everywhere, WordPress, YouTube… That clickbaity scheme, where one word in particular is written in all caps like “Feeling stuck? THIS is what you should do!”. I’m sorry, but as soon as I see it, I immediately judge you as an annoying mainstream person lol. Like come on people, show some integrity! 😂
I mean, I see and I know all the shit one would have to do to get some success in the monetary material world, but I’m just not up for it 🤷♀️ I have like zero interest in doing shit just for the money. If you gave me 1 million $ and in return I’d have to wake up at a time I’m usually sleeping… I’d rather choose ma sleep 🤷♀️ lol. Cuz I hate the feeling of getting up earlier than necessary and being tired and feeling like shit all day and that’s not even worth a fucking million dollars, okay? Okay. 😂 And this comes from a person that’s almost broke! 😂
Like imagine you’re in a desert in the middle of nowhere and if you don’t find water soon you’ll be dead tomorrow. Then what can the fucking 1 million $ in your bank account do for you? What would they be worth in that situation? Fucking nothing lol. They would probably even make things worse, cuz all your relatives would not even try to find you, but just say you’re dead, cuz they want to inherit your fucking money 😂 Okay, I’m being very cynical here, but it’s true that people do the most ridiculous and fucked up things for money 🤷♀️ N I’m over here too lazy take some pics of stuff I could sell and put it up for sale 😂 I might start doing something when I really have 0€ in my bank account, but only MAYBE 😂😂😂
You know, cuz dying of starvation is also not that bad, I’ve noticed 🤷♀️ Cuz you know, when you’re hungry you get kinda high and agitated a bit, I think it’s a natural mechanism that sets in which allows a peaceful death, because after all, that’s how things in nature die primarily, right? Either through starvation or through being eaten by some other animal, so 🤷♀️ It’s only logical that nature has come up with mechanisms to ensure a peaceful painless death.
During my dark night of the soul, I actually also intended to do that, since I had absolutely no energy or motivation to do anything and just wanted to die, I just thought okay, let’s just do fucking nothing, eat nothing and lie here until we starve to death lol. Well, that was a time when even getting up to brush my teeth was so fucking hard, I wouldn’t have been able to cook for myself anyway 🤷♀️🤣
Anyway, even now I notice how high and agitated I get when I’m hungry, it feels like I’m about to fly into the next dimension 😂😂😂 This will probably ma go-to way to die, if nothing else happens or I don’t get a hold of a bottle of Nembutal or something 😈😂
Oh yes, and today I also had a dream of my twin flame again, and again, it was a dream where we made up 🤷♀️ lol.
For some reason, I feel like writing a lot today, more than anything else, so I guess today, I’m primarily a writer 😂 Idk, if I’ll continue working on my drawing today or just rest and listen to music and watch that live stream of the 남산 타워 again lol.
You know, it helps me to zoom out again. I think I’ve said it before, but looking at things like this makes you remember the bigger picture when you’re caught up with petty problems or something. And today, since I felt kinda cozy, for some reason I felt like reading and watching some Korean stuff in a long time, but then the content is just… so fucking low-conscious 😂😂😂 Can’t read or watch that anymore 😂😂😂 Like all the societal norms and rules and low vibrations… When I read or watch that shit now it feels like a completely other world… An illusory world, a world that doesn’t exist, a world that’s made up of lies and pain and suffering, like… Where I am, that shit doesn’t even exist anymore, so I’m kinda shocked every time I see that there are still so many people who are caught up in that low-conscious way of thinking… It feels so unreal, like consciousness is telling me a joke or somethin’ lmao.
Anyway, I’m a little off today as well, maybe it’s because ma period is coming up 🤷♀️ lmao. And ma ENFJ friend be telling me that she’s exhausted too today (but that’s because she has a hangover *rolls eyes and smh* lmao).
N tomorrow I’ll probably go and pick up my new SD card, you remember? 😂
Also, I wanted to rant on all you deluded people again, who are afraid like little pussies because of that Corona shit, I mean, seriously? Is that still going on and are you fucking kidding me, like why are you so afraid? Cuz I read a blog post of some girl and she be like “I didn’t want to go out”, “I’m afraid to go out”, “I wanted to say something, but didn’t because I didn’t want to get close because of Corona” etc. etc. *throws up* lol. Also, “The news say…”. Are you fucking kidding me? If you still watch the news, believe that shit and let them influence you, you’re fucking dumb, okay? 😂
I’ve said it before (like really, a looooong time ago in this post) and I say it again, the reason why it’s not getting better is because you fucking try to suppress it, treat it like some symptom. But guess what, just because you treat the symptoms, the disease doesn’t fucking go away, okay? It’s like you have a cold, but instead of resting and letting it pass naturally you fucking pump yourself up with fucking pills that only treat the symptoms and then force yourself to go to work and shit and then what happens? The cold takes twice as long or doesn’t go away at all and turns into some serious fucking illness!
It’s your fucking fear and unnatural ways of trying to get rid of it that make it worse, not the lack of sanitation or masks -.- When y’all stop being such fucking deluded pussies?
N now excuse me, I’m off to dance to that song *turns around and waves like fuck y’all* XDDD Jeez, I am really cynical today XD
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